If Songs Were Dates - The Plenty Of Fish Playlist

In my honest opinion there aren't a great number of redeeming features about internet dating.  How are you supposed to tell if you like someone from an awkward, self consciously written handful of sentences?  Well one fellow POFfer I stumbled across had the rather genius idea of listing the songs he'd listened to while writing his profile.  

His selection is actually pretty representative of some of the types of fellas I've encountered  on the site,  So I've named the selection "The POF Playlist" - song choices courtesy of a tall, dark stranger - interpretation by moi:

Clifford T Ward - Home Thoughts From Abroad - Ah, the sentimental but slow ones. Opening message is usually some variant of 'Hi babezz hows u?'. They are the sweet guys, the ones I probably should be going for. But the conversation always goes a little flat when I ask are you more of a Tesla or Edison kind of guy?

Led Zeppelin - Tangerine - Uh oh, the one who's still pining for his ex. A pretty sad song about lost love, the best thing about this song for me has always been the end, I like the way the tempo goes a bit haywire and the guitar is just allowed to play, but the thrills are few and far between.

Alice In Chains - Dam The River - The date typified by Alice in Chains would probably be long haired, a bit awkward around ladies, and have passions outside of their career and homelife. All these things are good, providing the passions are not Xbox360 or LARPing!

Johan Bach - Air - The intellectual. Will probably list his personality type as 'sapiosexual', which is slightly intimidating as you wonder if you will be intelligent enough to get his motor running. He probably wont end up being that clever after all, he just has a subscription the the National Geo
graphic and thinks he is.

Mastodon - Curl Of The Burl - Mastodon are like the metal band you cant put in a box, with sounds and influences from a plethora of other genres. This date could be interesting and likely to surprise you but watch out for a slight air of superiority

QOTSA - Go With The Flow - This one will be 6'3 of pure rock god. Sex on legs, ginger, beautiful - practically perfect in every way. No wait, that's just Josh Homme, unfortunately.

R.E.M - Nightswimming - Earnest, sincere, sensitive. Probably wont appreciate my drunken humour and would possibly find me a bit uncouth.

I can't seem to find Josh's POF profile

Bootleg Vinyl - Them Crooked Vultures - The Verdict

Firstly, I would like to start by apologising to Them Crooked Vultures guitarist Alain Johannes, for failing to give him a mention in my initial excitement over the employment history of the other band members.  His own CV includes no less than working with a Josh Homme on some of his brainchildren, Brody Dalle's new set up, being a bit of a legend with a cigar box guitar, as well as writing and producing a bunch of influential music.  And more to the point he smashes it on my first bootleg vinyl - Live at Rockpalast.  Please accept this belated doffing of my cap.

Now I'm not keen on the term 'Supergroup' but it is a deserved accolade, there is no doubt that these gentlemen ooze skill and a certain confidence with both their instruments and their ability to work a crowd, which is laid bare here in bootleg format.  This record has a fluidity of performance but is brutally live - a fair distance away from overdubbed live albums ala Thin Lizzy's Live and Dangerous.

I'd be lying if I said the sound quality was as good as you'd expect from a label release, there's a few clicks and strange pauses, but hell - it sounds pretty epic when you turn it up loud.

The quality of the physical record is not at all substandard.  It's a good, heavy 180g pressing and the black cat logo on a home printed label gives the whole thing a deliciously underground vibe.  Like with all live albums on vinyl, it's a bit weird when you suddenly go from the sound of live action and a roaring crowd to the muffling of dead wax.

The first track No-one Loves Me and Neither Do I has got an oh so dirty bass, which is relentless and kind of beats you up just like bass does at a gig.  This is a no surprise considering  this was recorded at the Palladium in Cologne, which has a capacity for 4000 standing.

Maybe it's because the Germans have penchant for taking their rock in BIG, loud doses.  Maybe it's because you can clearly hear the crowd having a ball.

All in all I love it and my only regret is that I wasn't there!

P.S.  If you Google the acronym 'TCV', you will also come across the The Conservation Volunteers, for the record I dig what you guys do too.

What is Bootleg Vinyl and Why Do I Want One?

The term 'bootleg' applies predominately to music and alcohol that has been made and distributed illegally.

I don't know why only these two things exclusively but one might argue that they are happy enough bedfellows.  It doesn't for example, apply to DVDs, and you wont find a bootleg Balenciaga handbag. (Though you will find fake ones, I know because I have one from a market in Bangkok.)

With music it tends to refer to a recording of a live performance in particular.  Often these recordings are just circulated amongst fans but some bootleggers have it down to a fine art, doing much of the sound engineering and post-production you would expect a record label to do - and many fetch a price on grounds of rareness.

The "problem" here is that said record company is now cut out of the loop and not making any money from the bootlegged work.  Money which they are entitled to through copyright law.

Now you don't need me moralising on the subject, but just for the record (excuse the pun), I'll declare my stance.

Were you, the artist/label, planning to release a recording of that gig yourself?

• No.  No problem then.  We are fans and we want more recordings, of more stuff, at more venues.  We will likely buy your stuff alongside the bootlegs.
• Yes.  Well then you'd better make the official version better than, or different to, the bootleg if you want us to buy it.  If you cant manage that, go have a little cry to your hedge fund manager in Zurich or something.

If you are still feeling any modicum of guilt regarding bootlegs, read this great article, Bootlegs, An Insight into the Shady Side of Music Collecting, which highlights how bootlegged material has actually driven the direction of what an artist releases by showing the label what the fans really want.

I'll tell you a little yarn of my own.  A good friend of mine runs a really super music shop in town.  He attends record fairs and several times spotted none other than Mr Jimmy Page snapping up bootleg Led Zep recordings.  Back last year he says to me 'I suspect they'll start reissuing Led Zeppelin albums now, with "bonus, previously unreleased" material.'  Not long after, the music news was full of talk of the current Led Zep reissues.  Talk to your local music shop proprietor - they have their finger on the pulse!

Now the last thing I want is the downfall of any record labels - I'm a huge music fan and I dig a lot of the innovative work they do and of course the wonderful artists they support and bring to my ears.  I am just not a fan of creative monopolies - 'viva la grassroots, fan-led pressings', 'VIVA LA BOOTLEGGER'.

This discussion started with intrigue around a Them Crooked Vultures LP that I stumbled across:  Them Crooked Vultures - Live at Rockpalast 2009.

Label Details = 'Not on Label'.

I have a deep appreciation of the musical mind of Josh Homme, I am a fan of Kyuss, QOTSA and the Dessert Sessions, not to mention Nirvana, Foo Fighters and Led Zeppelin.  How on earth I have neglected to properly familiarise myself with Them Crooked Vultures, boasting members from all of these beloved bands?  I extol the virtues of the above bands live - grungey, noisey, raw and skilled - so I decided I'd like to hear a little live recording of Them Crooked Vultures.

And that's when I found 'Live at Rockpalast - Not on Label'.  This, I thought,  could be amazing.  A bunch of artists (Dave Grohl, Josh Homme, and John Paul Jones) known for understanding the importance of musicality over production and having a reputation for being kick ass live, potentially recorded straight off an amp at the gig.

Trying not to get totally carried away with myself, I decided to get a reality check from an audiophile friend who I knew wouldn't like the idea.

He didn't like the idea, he didn't like it one bit.

What kid of amateur equipment may have been used?  Has this rogue recorder gotten 'creative' in production between grabbing it from the gig and the vinyl press?

My friend's opinions and knowledge on vinyl are not to be rubbished but we are different people.  He has some LPs that he doesn't play because they are too rare and collectable.  Me?  I'm  more a 'spin it to death because it sounds so good' kind of girl.

So I am sitting here having a cup of tea and reading my order confirmation for Them Crooked Vultures, Live at Rockpalast 2009.  I'm intrigued to find out if my first bootleg vinyl will be all I hope, or whether my friend gave sound advice when he said 'I wouldn't touch it with someone else's barge pole.'